Dilan Muslu, Artist has depression (PEOPLE 2023)

My mum hated clothes on the floor. Growing up in such a neat and tidy house, I hated clothes on the floor. Floor was where you step with your dirty feet, clothes, even dirty, were not supposed to be on the floor. Floor was restricted. Couple years ago I, the photographer, was diagnosed with severe depression. Life was impossible and crying constantly was not optional. Sometimes getting a glass of water from the kitchen, which was 2 meters away, was a pain and a visible struggle. And for the first time in my life, clothes went on the floor. Not just the dirty ones too; worn ones, unworn ones, even the ones taken out of the tight wardrobe and cannot be hung back, because I simply did not have such power. Cooking stopped, eating did not stop but did not get healthy, at some point, even taking a shower became a struggle. Finally it was time to receive treatment. Then they told me what it was, severe depression that is. Heavy medications, therapies, manipulating my own brain to stop acting up.. Today, I am struggling with less, but the clothes are still on the floor. It will be one day at a time, one more thing fixed. But I know that one day, it will be the time that things do not go on the floor anymore. The life will be back, and it will be a portrait with a smile instead that I want to express.

Images have been resized for web display, which may cause some loss of image quality. Note: Original high-resolution images are used for judging.